Extinguished Memories

Succumbing to age

I am planning to leave Flickr as far as posting photos goes, at least for a while. I shall continue to vist my friends and contacts photos as much as I can. I want to do some writing, such as bringing my life story up to date. My story isn't about me, but all the people, places, and things I can remember—including the many friends I have on Flickr—that made me whom I am. I have hundreds of bits and pieces in hand-written notes, computer notes, and things on this and my writing blog I need to put together coherently.

Why would anyone as insignificant as I want to journal his life? Many times I've asked myself this question and I don't have an answer except to say 'I am of little significance to the Cosmos, yet my life is unique amongst men'. This is certainly true of all humans.

The real things that are pressing—and depressing—me are that I am losing my memory faster than I think I should. My old memories are fading to the point I am having trouble figuring what was real and what is imagined. New things aren't sticking with me like they used to. My attention span is almost nil. The bit of dyslexia from the mini-stroke I had years ago is becoming quite a nuisance, and I have to continuously edit anything I write, including comments made on people's photos. The arthritis in my fingers makes it impossible to know which key I will hit when I aim at one. Sometimes it takes minutes to write a simple sentence that I can understand. It generally takes an hour or more just to put a few readable (I hope) paragraphs in this blog. Creating and answering email is a problem, but I don't receive much ot it anyway. I would love to IM with my friends, but they would never know what I was trying to say. If not for a spell-checker, I wouldn't even try to write. None of this is a good sign, and I feel it will only worsen.

I do plan to keep this blog going as long as mentally and physically possible, and I hope it doesn't become more incoherent than it has been since I started.

Thank you dear friends for sticking with me all this time.
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Early tomorrow Carolyn and I will leave for a day trip to Cade's Cove at the southern end of The Great Smokey Mountains National Park. I have a GPS or I probably wouldn't find my way down there.