Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Blue and Gray

Low winter sun
The sun shines brightly in a pale-blue winter sky, but inside my mind a gray storm is untamed.
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Keegan finally got in touch with the family via Facebook for the for the first time since the day he arrived in Tokyo. Somehow his bank account has not caught up with him, he is flat broke, and his cell phone has been cut off. His message was short and we still do not know how to get money to him, but the most unsettling thing is he is scheduled to be reassigned to Afghanistan next June. His dad, sister, and Carolyn are all to pieces over that news; and I am not in a very good mood, either. However, I try to keep them a bit more positive by telling them it is a long time until June and the military could change his plans for the better, and if not, he will be safer in the desert than driving on the roads at home, and saying anything else upbeat I can think of; I just wish my words would work for me. Being the patriarch of the family is a burden I feel ill-equipped to carry.
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The family problem along with me being forced to look for work has me seeking more meditating time alone but my concentration is nil. I am not to the point of having anxiety attacks like I did when I found I was going to be a life-long cripple, but I am eating an occasional Xanax when I feel depression darkening my thoughts. I realize my job seeking is futile, but try I must as hope I have; peace of mind is at stake.
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Today's blog has for sure not been a ray of summer sunshine, but I had to unload somewhere and amongst friends seemed to be the comfort zone for me.
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The photo was made last evening in my living room as the sun cast its waning eye across some green bottles which adorn the ledge of a decorative, half-moon window.
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Wednesday peace, dear Friends.
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3 comments:

Anonymous said...

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Maggie said...

That photo is pretty neat!

I am sure he will get his banking problems sorted out soon. This is the military, after all. He must have someone to report this problem to and get it fixed. I can't imagine how you could do anything from here except send money to him directly.

May be you could be a Santa for the quickly approaching season. I recall that you have the hat already. Add a beard and the red suit the employer will supply and you are in business. :-)

Anonymous said...

Hi Maggie,

Keegan's problem is on the civilian side; he changed banks before leaving for Japan and they have him all messed up. His dad was supposed to be on the account, but they lost that particular info, so the bank will not release funds or information to anyone but Keegan himself and he is half a world away. At least this is how I understand it.

Good Idea on the Santa; I already have a mostly white mustache! Darned little brats want everything.

Thanks, my friend. :-)

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